How are you feeling today?

It’s a question we hear all the time at work, in passing, over text, or across the kitchen table with a cuppa. But have you ever considered the real power behind these words?

This simple phrase holds the power to open doors to self-awareness, empathy, and genuine human connection. Yet, so many people struggle to answer honestly. Why? Because many of us have never truly learned to recognise and name our feelings. Sometimes, we ask these questions out of sincere care for others. Other times, it’s merely a social habit, a reflex, with no expectation or desire for a real answer.

Do we really understand our feelings and how deeply they influence our lives? Or have we become so accustomed to asking and answering on autopilot that we lose sight of the humanity behind these words?

Think about it: you bump into someone you know, and they ask, “How are you?” For a moment, hope flickers, you feel seen, maybe even valued. You begin to answer, sharing a little piece of your world, only to notice their eyes glaze over, their attention drifting. In seconds, you realise their question was just a formality; they’re already longing to return to the topic that matters most to them, which you can guarantee is them.

You start to wonder: are they really listening?

The truth is, real listening is rare. It takes patience, humility, and practice. Listening isn’t just a sense; it’s an art, a skill honed over time, rooted in genuine care and focused attention. A good listener gives you space to speak, doesn’t interrupt, and waits until you’re truly finished before responding. When that happens, something magical takes place: a real connection forms. Your soul feels nourished. Suddenly, you realise, someone actually gives a shit about how you feel. You feel heard, seen, and understood, and it’s like someone has turned the light on inside you. That simple act can brighten your entire day.

So, from this day forward, when you ask either of these questions, ” How are you today? How are you feeling? How are you? .. Actually, stand and listen, because you just dealt the hand that’s opening somebody’s soul to you. Don’t crush that moment, or their soul… Or as my down-to-earth Yorkshire lass self would say, “Don’t be an arsehole!”

I send you my love,

Your friend for the journey,

Kate x

Mrs Katy Batten BA (Hons)

( Pronouns: She/Her), International Best Selling Author and Admin Management of New Pasture Lane Community Centre, Registered Charity No 700422.

DISCLAIMER: These blog posts are in no way, shape, or form to provide any professional advice and are for entertainment purposes only. The author/s take no personal responsibility or liability for any person/s who chooses to use the methods in their own lives.